nw talking to barret, it make me realise once again that the feeling of loneliness had always been there... lonely not becos i am single... just feel that no one understand me so i felt i am being left alone... even though i have alot of friends but i still feel lonely at times.... my msn contact list have alot of ppl's contact but who is/are the one who noe me well..?
i guess in the past until nw i guess no one really understand me well... cos i dun even understand myself... i dunnoe wat i wan... i dunnoe where to go... completely lost... one after another unhappy happening, i am really lost... my heart had died epecially after i gotten my o lvl result...
我的心死了，我也跟着迷路了。现在我只剩下躯壳。一个没了灵魂的躯壳。曾经一时，我的心再度活了起来。但很快就死了。它将永远沉睡下去， 再也没有苏醒的一天。
i really wish someone will understand me... whether is a gal friend or a guy friend... i just dun like the feeling of loneliness... in the past, i belive i am fine being alone... i dun need any friends... i am capable of doing anything without anyone help.... knowing josephine and yueling, especially ling had change my thinking... i think ling is the only one close to knowing the true me ba... sometime she understand me more than i noe abt myself...
when ppl grow up they will tend to think better and have to think deeper... i think i am think too deep liao ba... always aiming for perfect... nothing less than a perfect... that is y i like philosophy stuff... suddenly i rmb something my ss teacher in sec sch told me.... i was telling him something i read from a book: what u choose depend on who u r, who u r depend on wat u choose... i think it was quite true but he said it is experince that depend who u r and who u r depend on what experince u had gone through...i think that is even more suitable to say abt one's self than what i had read from the book... i had always rmb what he said even since then...
at some point in time i wish to go back to the past to change who i am today... i dun like who i am now but there is nth i can do to change.... cos of some experince i had gone through.... it is not sometime u wan to change and it can be changed... like being a crybaby... i told myself endless time... promise myself endless time not to cry anymore... but in the end i still cry... there is alot of things that is beyond human control and hard to change.... all this really matches wat my ss teacher had told me....
haha... i was talking abt feeling lonely de... suddenly talk abt other things... haha... die liao la... my mind is thinking deeper and deeper liao... haiz... sometime i am really lost and lonely i will wish that i will be granted a long slp.... i wished for the long slp but i have no gut to grant myself that... haiz...
i had been down this few days... just hope everything will be better from nw...
Labels: lonely and lost
nice clothes on the web
nice dress??? this look very mature and sweet... haha...
this dress will make less mature ba... haha... i dun usually like green clothes but this one is quite nice...
this look like something cai jing in the princess hour will wear de...
my favourite dress... sian.. no work so cannot buy this dress... this dress is so cheap lo... $24 plus onli... cant rmb is it $24.90 liao... haha... sian... so sad... must faster go find a job so that i can buy anything i wan...
this goes well with a jean jacket... i had one jean jacket but there is no clothes for me to match... so i hope to get one when i had money.... ^^
i like the whole image of this dress...
Labels: nice clothes on the web
nice accessories i see on website
saw this necklace when i was looking around on the web... look quite elegance and sort of formal. i quite like the desidn of it...
i like this necklace alot... cos it is very unique... not like other necklace it needed to hook so that i wont drop... this doesnt need a hook... it look so nice on lu... i dunnoe how it will look on me... i found this at a taiwan website... sian... dunnoe singapore have it anot...
angel necklace!!! look so cute... but i dun like the ring... it will be better without the ring... ^^
clover bracelet... i always wanted to have a clover item... as it is said that if u are able to find a clover u will be blessed with good luck... i think i am always very suay de so really need one to bless me... haha...
Labels: nice accessories i see on website
playing mahjiong at rex's hostel
bored of playing mahjiong in my com so play it for real.... carrie, jason rex and me playing at rex's hostel. haha... quite happy to play... rex is our teacher... haha...
Labels: playing mahjiong at rex's hostel
classmate n me at cafe 155
from left to right is cristal, mei yean, shu hui, kel, mei jing, me and carrie. taken when we are having our first breakout at the cafe 155. haha... i forget is it really cafe 155... srry poor memory ... but the figure sound familiar...
Labels: classmate n me at cafe 155
classmate n me near sch enterance
from left to right is me, karen, cristal, kel ,mei yean and carrie.
i think we look so stupid to be taking photo in our school especially near the enterance of the school.
this pic abit hard to see cos we wan to have the head of the giraffe in the pic too.
Labels: classmate n me near sch enterance
